Where's Waldo (Cork)? WARNING long post

[Mike Cork]

Warning, you'll need a cold drink to get through this post...

I want, no I need, to apologize for my absence on the forum this past summer and fall. I have had some life changes which took me away from everything, including the forum and fishing. My mind had to build compartments to deal with it all and things got left out. I probably haven't been fishing 5 times since my mother came to visit last May. Two of those were tournaments of which I was lucky enough to win one.

I am not special, everyone on this earth deals with life issues and struggles, some are difficult, and some are just the way it goes. We get through them. I'm not making excuses but rather an explanation to why I disappeared. Was it the right way to deal with life? I don't know but it's how I did.

I have been blasted with some medical issues, some financial issues, and some family issues that personally knocked me in the dirt. Mostly I see these issues as part of getting old and something I must learn to deal with. Call it a midlife crisis or a man learning life as it continually evolves. None the less, I must man up!!

I'm going to put it out there just so folks know. Please don't think I'm looking for sympathies, as I said it's life and everyone on this earth must deal with the struggles.

My biggest issue has been my diabetes. My A1C, try as I might to control it, reached over 9.5 (should be between 5-6.5) last spring. Most people know, but 9.5 is very bad. Over the last 9 months my doctor has added more Metformin, Jardiance, and we are on my second type of injection. This has all culminated in me losing over 35% of my body weight and my magnesium falling through the floor (Magnesium controls your heart). I lost 8 inches off my waist; you can't imagine how sick I look compared to my former self. I can't afford new clothes as we must keep growing teens in clothes and food LOL (besides I'm not out to impress anyone so I'm good). All my friends were asking if I had serious medical problems (this screws with your head over time). My A1C is below 8 now but even with everything we are doing, medication and diet wise, my blood sugar continues to be a problem. I'm trying to add some exercise back in, however with 4 back surgeries it's a very slow go. I have got to find a way to replace the muscle mass I've lost. Losing weight was great at first but now it's getting concerning. Looks like I'll be on insulin soon. I also must fix the magnesium. I am taking 2000mg morning and night just to keep the cramps down and enough in my system to keep my heart firing correctly. Potassium is the big heart controller and mines good, thankfully.

I have now started having anemia issues with high white blood cell count and have included a cancer doctor. Try sitting in a waiting room at a cancer doctor's office and not feel overwhelmed with all the people who are truly sick sitting next to you. This really screwed with my head. These people were very sick, not contagious and that's not what messed with my head, but rather "Am I the next guy puking into a trash can waiting to see the doctor?" My numbers are slowly getting better, but the doctor doesn't know why they were bad, nor does he know why they are getting better. I'm in the processes of getting a new doctor to make sure this one isn't missing something.

Want to freak out, have your primary care doctor tell you that your PSA number went through the roof. (For you young guys - this is something in your blood that can indicate prostate cancer. OR an infection of the prostate.) Thankfully it was the infection caused by one of the diabetes drugs I'm on. The Jardiance is known to do this. A round of antibiotics and numbers are okay again.

My thyroid is toast. Hypothyroidism, Hashimoto's Disease, my body doesn't produce any of the hormone needed to get you moving each day. So, on days that my blood sugar is high and my thyroid meds aren't working right, my fatigue is beyond explanation. I truly can't explain how hard it can be to get moving, you could guarantee me to catch the bass of a lifetime, or if I could just walk to the end of the street I would get $1 million dollars and I'm not sure I could take a step.

Laurie has severe migraines causing her to be bedridden. I have foiled the windows so no light can get in. She fights not to take meds because they put her to sleep and she doesn't want to sleep her days away, however, right now, most days it's not an option. The doctors have started her on a medication that is administered via infusion at the hospital. This seems to be helping some. Laurie's Fibromyalgia has also taken a tremendous toll on her. Fibromyalgia can trigger the migraines; however, it also causes her nerves to create the feeling of a major sunburn on most of her skin and flu like body aches. She fights to be able to function for a couple hours most days. Laurie does have a few good days a month and we try to take advantage of just getting out of the house and enjoying some sunshine in the yard.

Our grandsons? WOW...
They are good kids, but they are showing their asses a lot more often. At 13 and 14 years old, they have those days when they believe the house rules don't apply to them, or they should be able to do as they please and still eat us out of house and home. One of the biggest issues is they don't understand, nor do I really expect them too since they don't have a clue, how the fatigue of illness can really affect life. They need rides to football, wrestling, Jr ROTC. Watching all the games, matches, and drills, will completely wipe us out. It's not fair to them that we are not the mid 30's parents they deserve. We do all we can and keep swinging... I am so grateful the boys enjoy and participate in these programs, however it's not just the energy, but the cost. Sports and ROTC uniforms are just unbelievably expensive. The boys get to go to a "yuppy" (for lack of a better term) school. Mike Johnson, our current House Speaker, kids go to the school... lots of money floating around our doublewide. Fortunately, the school has many donors that donate tremendous funds and there are scholarships for all these programs, the school administrators always help us out with applying for them and we've been lucky to get some finical support. Because it's a pride issue to take a handout, with the money donated, it forces me to get my ass up and drive them back and forth to practice and games even when my diabetes and hypothyroidism have my fatigue at a "can't lift myself into the truck" level.

Then there is the part of life that we try to save a little money for because you know it's going to happen. Shit Breaks!!! In May when my mother was visiting, my stand along freezer caught on fire. Yep FIRE!!! Thankfully the smoke detector worked, and we were able to handle it before significant damage to the walls. Found a replacement at a local "Skent and Dent" shop for about a grand. Shit is getting crazy expensive.

The boys and I had been rebuilding a riding lawnmower, after getting it all back together and $300 in various parts (BTW the time together on this project and lessons learned were invaluable... well worth the money) the transmission blew, and the mower is too old for transmission parts or replacement. We have a little over an acre lot. I felt like it would be a punishment to make them mow it with a push mower and it wasn't their fault my plan didn't come together. So, we found a used rider for $1000. See the theme here...1k 1k 1k 1k

Why is it so hot in the truck... take it in to have the A/C topped off and of course there is a leak. "Please don't tell me the compressor is out?" "No sir, it's a hard line." I'm thinking cool, cheap easy fix. NOPE, the line was a "dealer only" part and it went into the firewall, all said and done parts and labor $1800.

Truck Transmission... I won't even get into this but if you have a 1500 Ram with an 8 speed transmission it's $1400 to have the fluid and filter changed.

These are just a few of the events in my last few months. There is more, much more, but if you've read this far you are surely bored and ready to quit, thank you for your time, however just one last thing...

I am saddened to say, with all life has dealt me, I didn't have the mental capacity to prepare for Adopt A Family this year. It hurts to know that there are people out there who won't have food, electricity, heat. People who have had their entire worlds stripped away because of their life troubles, a hurricane, or a medical condition that prevents them from working. People we could have helped. It's the past recipients of Adopt A Family who give me the strength on those bad days, if they can keep going I can keep going. I can pay my bills, I can feed the kids, I worry about a lot of things, but the grandkids next meal isn't one of them.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving and like me are thankful for all you have!!!

I'm gonna keep swinging and hoping to spend some more time at my home away from home Ultimate Bass.

If you made it here, thank you for reading  

[bassmedic46]

I hope you and Laurie have a wonderful Thanksgiving. Will keep you in my prayers that you and Laurie feel better.

[TechAdmin]

I feel you, sorry to hear all of that... Genuinely looks like you should be the one to be adopted

I'm also going through an extremely rough patch, 10 days ago an elderly neighbor and friend of mine died in just a few days... I have the very grim task to go through his photo collection (photographer) and sort it, to delete duplicates, empty folders etc. Rather self-inflicted but since I was the one helping him out with computer, networking, house stuff and photos that's... On me to do.
Plus job market issues, it's so incredibly bad and wages are stuck in the 90s, whereas everything else costs 3 times as much, incredibly depressing.

Watch out with the grandsons, though. At that age they just want to be with you all the time and with all of their energy they can't fully understand why you simply can't keep up due to your health issues. Some 20 years ago my parents explained me that concept, and I had started to walk/stand myself anywhere to avoid having either of them stand or walk to reach me. Those memories are blurry but... Yeah. Talk to their parents, they should have that conversation with them.

More on that later

[big g]

Sorry to hear Mike.  I hope 2025 brings you and your family some relief.  God bless you both!

[ike8120]

I hope things turnaround for you and your family. 

[Princeton_Man]

Wow! So sorry to hear this Mike. I agree with Flavio, with all you've done to keep adopt-a-family going, you should be our adopted family. Sending up prayers for you, Laurie, and the boys.

[Capt. BassinLou]

Whoa,, sorry to hear what you guys are going through Mike. Hopefully 2025 is you're guys turn around year.

[Donald Garner]

Mike I have you and Laurie in my daily prayers.  I pray that a better day comes soon for you and your family.

Keep your head up brother.

[Mike Cork]

Thank you everyone! We looking forward to the turn of the year and some better days ahead    

[FlatsNBay]

Glad you're doing a little better.

[topdsm0138]

  Hang in there buddy. Glad you're feeling a little better. 

[caddyjoe77]

"this too, shall pass as they say" -- hang in there

[Princeton_Man]

"this too, shall pass as they say" -- hang in there

You're thinking of kidney stones.

[D.W. Verts]

God Bless you and the family Mike.

Dale

[caddyjoe77]

"this too, shall pass as they say" -- hang in there

You're thinking of kidney stones.

  not exactly but yea 

[J.W.]

Mike, I hate to hear that y'all are going through it right now. The financial stuff is a stress, I know that song and dance pretty well, but I'll definitely be praying for y'all and especially for your health. That's the most important thing, and I hope they're able to get the diabetes and autoimmune stuff to a manageable point soon. Man, I'm only minutes away and my son is probably at the same school as your grandkids. If you ever need anything, you've got my number.